During the course of a lesson students will say the funniest things. Over the past few years we have written them down (while we were still laughing) and offer them to you here. Kaitlin C: "There is a repeatment in this song." Jerome: You were watching TV while you played the violin? Allison C : "It was during the rests." KD: Who knew that being relaxed would be so much work? Corinne: What kind of instrument is a Piano? Student: "It's a percussion instrument because you hit it with a hammer." Mike W. (Guitar) "I've never gotten my pinkey to do anything important." Tessa H: "Jerome, you are a bad joke genius." Corinne: You're reading notes on the wrong clef. Bethany H. "I can't help it. I'm dis-clef-sic." Bethany H. "Easier sung than played". (Said while humming correct notes and playing wrong notes). Corinne: You didn't play the last note in that measure. Bethany H. "Yeah, but it sounds OK without it!" Jerome: What are you going to do differently at the recital? Robert: "Take lots of Advil." Bethany H. "I can't pedal that way, I have little feet." Dakota D. "I don't have the first page....my dog got into my room and peed on it." Bethany H. "I'm playing this slow so I can let my fingers rest." Thomas R. (Viola) "They should either be all high 2's or all low 2's." Emily W. "I don't understand, it worked at my house..." Hannah A. (Cello) "You kept sticking the left arm out and saying "is it raining?" and when the lesson was over, it was raining." Aleta B. "Are the B's SHARPENED again?" Aleta B. "I've been taking piano since I was four....I know you people (teachers) are omnipotent." Aleta B. "They should have put a sharp on that G, because "ocularly" it looks wierd." Jerome: You cannot use the "loaner" pick because you have too many friends. Aleta B. "A's are usually flatted not sharped." Aleta B. "When I practice I try not to mix more than one key signature in the same day." Aleta B. "My left hand is staccato at home....I promise." Sean S. (Guitar) "Can I just remove the 6th string for this song?" Reanna G. "I didn't do my theory because I was practicing too much." Jenny M. "I found that I could keep a really good beat if I chewed Doritos when I practiced." Corinne: Play it again Nicky, I like to watch you suffer. Nicky K. "Just for that I'm not going to suffer this time." Nicky K. (after mistakes) "I was just listening to see how it would sound if I played it that way." Nicky K. "I did practice, but I was abducted and brain-washed this week." Corinne: Do you know what a natural minor scale is? Nicky K. "Yeah, it's organic." Corinne: Do you know what a virtuoso is? Nicky K. A virtuo of "ooh so." Beth B. "Now you KNOW I practiced it because I can't get it right." Ann B. "I only practice the stuff I'm really, really good at." Ann B. (referring to a staccato) "That would be a "HOPPY" quarter note." Jack B. (after a mistake) "Oh, you mean play it like it usually is." Julia M. (after several mistakes) "This piano needs to be tuned." Julia M. (after missing a note) "It's hard to blink when you're playing." (can't see the notes). Julia M. "My sister grew her fingers out from playing the piano." Kyla M. "I'm afraid to practice because I might get it wrong." Corinne: Did you lose your place? Jean B. "I didn't have a place...I was doing it from memory." Jean B. "I see things on the music." (that really aren't there). Jean B. "My dog doesn't like to hear me play scales. She flops down and sighs...." Corinne: Did you like your last teacher? Maggie G. "Yes, but she had to quit because she couldn't make enough money. She wanted to get a REAL job." Corinne: You girls are REALLY playing together now! So now you just need to practice a lot to get rid of the mistakes. Maggie G. "Can't we just tell them we are sorry?" Shannon C. (in a 6/8 duet she counts off...) "5 - 4 - 3 - 2 - Ready, get set, GO!" Shannon C. (Sostenuto Pedal) "Sausage and Noodle Pedal." Shannon C. (on syncopation) "Oh, that's piano slang." Corinne: What is an E sharp? Melinda B. "An F sharp not sharp." C M. (before he begins) These are the right fingers....right? Corinne: Whose fingers did you bring? C M. "I mean I put the right ones on...didn't I.?" Heidi R. "A "Sinatra" is a piece with a solo instrument and accompanist." Reanna G. (to herself) "Slow Down....I'm going faster than myself." Matt R. (practicing the Rachmaninoff) "This is such an easy peice to miss notes on." Corinne: That chord does not sound good. Sean M. "It doesn't "look" too good either." Ellen J. "Singing "Cocktails" and muscles, alive, alive, oh." Morgan N. "It sounds better on my T.V." Corinne: What does Cantible mean? Jenny K. "Singing-ling." Jenny K. "Just a second, my hand needs to think." Sean M. "Corinne, you're not old...I know perfectly young people who wear red." Corinne: Is it the Key signature that's the challenge? Sean M. "No, it's all those sharps." Corinne: You're in 9th grade! Your pieces are going to be 4 to 5 pages long now, OK? Connor M. "Not really....I don't like to turn that many pages." Katy W. (on playing Chopin cadenzas) "Do I have to play all THOSE notes....They're so random?" Corinne: Katy....it's Chopin! Corinne: Are you improvising? Melinda B. "No, I'm variating it." Melinda B. "When my music is wrinkled and torn, it shows I love it." Krista W. "Why is "P" soft??!! "P" should be for POUND!" Corinne: What is the difference between Molto Ritardando, and Poco Ritardando? Tegan C. "Get slower faster?" Jerome: To get better you must see someone better than you every week. Connor M: "Well, that's not happening with me." Rachael Z. (said after 15 minutes of hard work and counting) "I'm really tired...there must be some sleeping gas in here." Natalie G: (Referencing "blonde" jokes) "Jerome, you play too many instruments to be blonde." Ashley F. "There is no "I" in duet." Heidi R. "It seems like my hands move around alot...it must be my imagination doing the wrong thing." Corinne: What is the difference between a 5th and a 6th? Kyla M. silence....Corinne: I said "one note." Kyla M. "Oh, I thought you were talking about something that had more significance." Tegan C. "If I had two right hands I'd be really good!"